Comeback Lines For When He Says It’s Over:
Oh well, every happy women has at least one ex boyfriend behind them.
(Burst into the Pink song) “So what, I’m still a Rock Star! I’ve got my Rock moves and I don’t need you…”
Well, I hope the next girl you kiss has something extremely contagious on her lips!
Well, this calls for a celebration!
I think it’s probably for the best. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, but I realised a while ago that I see you as more of a brother figure.
That’s alright, because I love you BUT I’m not in love with you.
Okay. Don’t talk to me any more… And delete me from your Facebook Friends.
Well, if that’s the case you are not exactly the answer to my prayers!
It’s okay, I actually agree that things were getting a little stale and I want to experiment a bit.
I had a feeling your heart wasn’t in it anymore, because there didn’t seem to be any passion there.
I think I’ve been guilty of romanticizing the whole thing. You’re not really everything I thought you’d be.
That’s okay, I know I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable!
That’s a shame… I was secretly planning to propose to you!
If you’re going to hurt me, do it quickly… Because I’m not spending any more time crying over someone who’s not going to stick around.
Cool. But when you see me with someone else, don’t you dare come running back to me.
That’s okay. Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m too hot to be with someone like you!
That’s okay because I’ve been feeling something more for someone at work.
If you don’t have a problem walking out of my life, then I don’t have a problem shutting the door behind you an changing the lock.
What! Are you drunk or something?
Thanks - because I fell out of love with you ages ago and just didn’t know how to tell you.
Oh, that’s a relief because I’ve fallen in love with someone else.
OK, no hard feelings - So is it OK if I date your best friend/boss/brother/father?
That’s OK. Because I’ve been cheating on you for months.
OK. I have to admit, I’ve been seeing someone else. Did you find out?
OK, let’s bury this relationship and be done with it.
I want to break up too, because I couldn’t stand another day being around you.
Fine, because I haven’t been honest with you during our entire relationship.
That’s fine with me. I’m already dating someone new, and I’m really excited about him!
That’s OK, apparently a girl has to date one or two bad men first, before she finds a good one!
Well, I suppose now is not a good time to let you know I’ve booked us a romantic getaway!
Hang on, it aint over til the fat lady sings…”Tra la la la la, la, la, la, lahhh!”
The worst way to love someone is to sit next to them, knowing they don’t love you back.
I guess you don’t realize how much you care about someone until they don’t care about you.
Oh. Poor me!
Yeah well i was getting kind of bored dating you.
Well we were going to split over religious differences sooner or later anyway, what with you thinking you’re God and me disagreeing…
Look over at that house plant - you’re on Candid jerk.com!
Well, all I can say is thankyou for being the one to show me what kind of guy I don’t want to be with.
That’s fine with me - Men are like dessert. Nice, but not neccessary!
Okay. Here’s just a reminder of what you can’t have! *flash breasts*
Gosh you must have been reading my mind - I’ve wanted out of this crappy relationship with you for weeks now!
Hmmm. I’m just wondering what I was doing when you decided you didn’t want me any more!
Ok, Good luck finding someone better than me - you idiot!
Breakup? Wanna get married instead?!
OK, seeya later - NEVER!
I want to thank you for giving me the worst day of my life.
Well thankyou for raining on my parade!
Ok, I’ve got places to go, things to see and people to do!
It’s ok. I’d rather date a man with a better job.
*Burst into song* “I can have another you in a minute, infact he’ll be here in a minute baby!”
Oh thank goodness - now I can have some happiness in my life!
Oh thank goodness - now I don’t have to pretend I’ve been happy in our relationship!
That’s OK, and don’t bother telling me why - I’m happy to get the hell away from you!
That’s OK - It only takes one bad boyfriend to make you realise you deserve SO much more!
If one day I actually start to matter, let me know.
That’s OK. I can’t stand the sight of you body naked. And your heart is made of ice. Not exactly what I’m looking for in my future.
Ummmm…. This is awkward - I was just about to dump you too!
That’s cool. Cancel my subscription - I’m tired of all your issues!
That’s cool. I’m looking for someone a little more intelligent…
If you’re stupid enough to walk away - Then I’m smart enough to let you go.
Well, my big mistake wasn’t falling for you. It was being fooled enough to think you fell for me too.
If you’re dumb enough to let this relationship go - you didn’t deserve it in the first place!
Thankyou for breaking my heart. You’ve only made me me stronger.
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.